CPAC Comedy Central #2


KLONDIKE, CPA Central, Bam’s Shack – With the recent announcement of CPAC’s “Comedy Central” plans and an amazing waiting time to prepare the second and more than likely last adaption of this column is here! Prepare to be offended and triggered as much as possible.

Due to the trashy times and extremely amazing persistence of the CPAC staff I’ve managed to crumble up as much Satire and Comedic things in my arsenal. Due to this i’ll be throwing out a few items in my comedic arsenal to truly blow your cocks away. Prepare yourself because this will more than likely disappoint 90 percent of you.

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Story Time


Multi-Army Enigma with Trader

With all the new buzz going around and the dreadful situations casted on Trader, consistently being ticked off or thrown out by other armies caused a serious spark in his head, No more would he sit around and let armies push him, he pushed forward to expand his inner horizon. He quickly closed out of his 3 tabs and headed to his local noob fest army – Takis, after quickly boasting about his abilities to combat botting with his advanced multilogging skills he was granted the title of leader. This was nice, but not nice enough for what trader had in mind when he wanted revenge…

Soon after trader found himself once again looking for more armies to showcase his skills in pushing further into small armies he ran into more cancerous armies and one by one began being put in charge. Later on he meet up with an old friend bam117, who looked as dashing and as handsome as the very last time he saw him. Bam joking suggested of making another ACP to piss off the current masses and cause a ruckus, little did he know this would nearly completely backfire on his original goal – getting him along with bam bannished from ACP entirely. This would spark rage in not only his head but the tip of his other head as well – he wanted the world to know just how many armies he could tab in, and so he did – his newly formed alliance “AMU” would strike fear in the hearts of armies – and even Mchappy, who trader especially hated because of his often noticeable flamboyant comments towards trader. This may have meant trader was just undeniable gay or perhaps just extremely unconfident in his sexuality.

Sadly his endeavors were cut short due to a assassination plot against him formed by ACP’s jewish conspirators . Thousands of jew juice filled gun shots rained down on Trader and the rest of AMU head quarters, the ceiling crumbling all around him along with his dreams of taking back ACP into his hands. Lucky for him Bam hide a escape route behind the bookshelf that was rarely ever used – very similar to the one Hitler escaped to Peru in. After clawing his way out of the encased cave and hopping on the Grande’ Mexican Border Hopping Boat.



This is my most notable addition to my weekly installments, basically making the entire post worth it because I’m pretty sure no one ever reads the fanfiction I write about trader, but regardless here you go!



Not that you are notable, because you are in fact a extreme pedofile with hairy man boobs, please stay away from small children (ACP Chat). BUT ANYWAYS! COME ON DOWN TO DCP CHAT AND CLAIM YOUR PRIZE! (Banishment)


I literally hate my life

Please Kill Me

//===|| – Bam – ||====\

CPAC Associate Producer 

~ Words of Inspiration from my friends ~

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6 Responses

  1. That screenshot of me saying I haven’t talked to a girl for 13 years is false and blatantly edited by Bam. In reality, I haven’t spoken to a girl for 17 years.


  3. I like all my posts just like I like my own comments _#TBH

  4. SUUUHHHHH DUUUDDEEE, better make me famous!
    BTW, idc what you have said to me from this post, but that screenshot is funny. You should know that l am a skinny man, and l work out, but l don’t have “hairy man boobs.” LOL

  5. If I didn’t know you well, I’d actually believe that. Not many women are interesting in learning how to bot raid

  6. lmaoo my b

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